AP Exam Prep: Almost As Stressful as the Test

Staff Writer: Ashlyn Richardson

As an AP student, no one tells you, “Hey, eating a good breakfast isn’t the only thing that will help you get through the grueling, painstaking testing ahead of you.” Therefore, I decided to assign the task of being an AP exam guardian angel to myself. Below are a few things I have found that have been beneficial in my test taking endeavors:

  1. Purchase an IV kit. Fill the IV bag with your favorite energy drink and stick that sucker in your vein. This will help you stay awake all night to cram for a test your teacher did not prepare you for in any way, shape, or form!
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IV Kit, ready for use

2. Make sure to sharpen your pencils before the test. Nothing is worse than reaching for a pencil to give yourself a frontal lobe lobotomy in the middle of the test and not having a pencil that’s sharp enough to do it! Josephine Sherpard, a junior at Woodstock High School credits her success on the AP Human Geography exam specifically to this tactic. She said it was the perfect way to relieve her stress.

3.Attend your teacher’s review sessions before or after school even though they are at the most convenient hours of the day. Sure you’ll only get five hours of sleep or have to forgo all the extracurricular activities that boost your college applications, but it is totally worth barely passing the exam.

4. While on the way to the exam, drive your car into the nearest pole or tree. Personally, this is one of my favorite ways to prepare because the car crash is much less painful than taking the test!

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Proper way to crash car

5. Rent some Etowah football players to hype you up before you do the test. Their roid rage is contagious and can supe up even the most timid of testers.

6. DO NOT EAT BREAKFAST BEFORE THE TEST. Actually, don’t eat anything for a couple days before the test. This will give you a better chance of fainting during the test. By doing so, you can ensure a couple more days to study.

7. Evan Zaner, a senior at Woodstock High School, says his favorite thing to do is to repeatedly cough and distract everyone in order to lower the school average and make his score look even better.

8. Legally change your last name so you can sit next to the valedictorian when testing. This is useful because if you’re ever stuck, you can look at their test and be confident in your copying.

By following the tips above, I can guarantee you won’t fail your exam too badly! Regardless of if you follow all or just a few, your score will probably not be better than what you thought but as the great Michael Scott once said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.”

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