The Truth About High School Relationships

Staff writer: Lani Yun

The Truth About High School Relationships

High school sweet hearts, we’ve all heard the term. Whether it be through your parents who tell you time and time again about their glory days or your teachers who pick fun at the couple in the class. But whether you’re single as can be or searching for “teenage love”, I would like to think we can all agree that high school couples are one of the worst things about school.

Now, I haven’t even begun my argument yet and I’m sure most of you are up in arms, but hear me out. What is the one thing that prevents students from getting to class on time besides freshmen who frolic around the hallways forming human chains and not letting you around? Answer, it’s the people who cannot wait until next period to politely stop SUCKING EACH OTHERS FACES OFF. I mean really, do you absolutely have to stand in the middle of the hallway and block everyone else’s path? Is it life threatening to you to have to wait until the end of the school day for you and your lover to take part in PDA? Frankly, the answer is no, which is why I am asking the question as to why it is still going on.

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An acceptable form of PDA

Photo courtesy of creative commons

So here’s the thing, if you want to hold hands with said partner and share a small exchange of affection before seeing one another off to a class period, I will gladly adore your relationship from afar and go about my day. But please, and I am begging you, do not make me endure the sight of you trading saliva with another person while you two practically grope each other in the middle of the hallway. Or even if this horrid cesspool of fondness toward each other is off to the side, surprisingly people can, wait for it, this is a shocker, STILL SEE YOU. And believe it or not, most people don’t enjoy seeing you shove your tongue down someone else’s throat, in fact it makes them really uncomfortable, like, really really uncomfortable. Quoting Emma Visser, a senior at Woodstock High school, she tells me that accidentally making eye contact with someone who is in the middle of creating public displays of affection is super awkward because you really don’t know whether to look away and keep walking or evoke an even more awkward noise and simply run away. And quite frankly, I couldn’t agree more.

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An example of where not to show PDA

Photo courtesy of creative commons

So, for future reference, let’s covered what we have learned. Do not stop in the middle of the hallway to make out with your partner, other students trying to get somewhere find it extremely annoying. Try to avoid eye contact or accidental touching with other students if you must indulge in PDA, it’s even more uncomfortable than accidentally glancing at it. Please, at all expenses, do not force others to watch you take part in whatever you do with your girlfriend/boyfriend, even if you think you’re out of sight, save it for outside of school where we don’t all have to find a trashcan to vomit into. And lastly, for the love of all that is holy and good , DO NOT kiss/make out/smooch (whatever you call it) so loudly that I can hear you from the portables, I beg. So if you plan to take part in a relationship during your high school years, please keep these guide lines in mind, the student body will thank you.

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