Don’t Touch My Food

Section Editor: Ashley Humphries

I am the type of person, that if you touch my food without my permission, you are asking for the silent treatment from me and possibly the end of a friendship.

If I do not give you permission to eat a piece of my snack, do not touch it!

Notice I said “a piece.” Not a handful. When you say “piece,” you get ONE piece, and if you want more, you have to ask before you can just take more because I only gave permission for one piece.

Also, notice I said “my snack.” The word “my” means “belonging to or associated with the speaker,” the word is meant for one person, not two. One…and that one person is me.

Notice I said the word “snack” as well, I did not say breakfast, lunch or dinner. Does it look like I have a full plate of multiple kinds of snacks? No. I have one snack for the school day. I cannot stress this enough, one! One snack for one person for one school day.

If you reach for my snack, without my permission, best believe you will get a smack to the back of your hand at the speed of light. I can be that quick, especially when it comes to food, especially my food. If you reach for my snack, I will look at you with the face of “Who do you think you are? Reaching for my snack is a no-no, girl.” (Or boy, I don’t discriminate.)

If you do not know me, you will get a warning or you will know by the way I glare at you. If you know me, do you really think it is smart to reach for my food without permission? You should already know the answer, regardless of you knowing me or not.

I am sure most people are like this. For example, I was working one night and a family came in with three kids. One of the kids wanted the other kid’s sandwich and reached for it, the little girl smacked the boy’s hand and said, “Uh, no, Charlie, get your own.”

She was adorable.

Whenever WHS senior Mina Schuler is asked to share her food she will either say, “No, what happened to your food?” or “Dig in!” But, it is imperative for you to wait on her reply before reaching. There is no sense in risking your hand.
As I stated before, most people must be like this. For example, Ed Sheeran, he is a very nice famous person, but I am sure when it comes to food he could be the same way. Oh, and by the way, if you have not listened to Ed Sheeran’s full new album called Divide; you are behind and need to catch up. So, listen to it because it is amazing.

Any who, do not touch my snacks without my permission. Keep your rusty, dusty, musty, crusty little fingers off my food.


“I cannot stress this enough, do not touch my food.”

Picture Credits: Creative Commons


Stay on your desk, not mine. I am saying this in the nicest way.

Picture Credits: Creative Commons

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